PTSD never hits the same way twice.
There are days when you think you’re never going to be “normal” again. You wish you could just breathe regularly, stop shaking, and get a hold of yourself.
And then there are the days when you think you’ve done it.
You’ve won the fight.
Survived the battle.
Beat the bad guy.
That is, until you discover a new weakness and your world spirals out of control again.
The hard truth is, sometimes we have to be okay with…not being okay.
Just ask Jessica Jones, one-time superhero who hung up her (figurative) cape after some pretty serious trauma.
Even Marvel characters have off days.
And yet she has so far managed to power through, despite the constant danger, a controlling ex, and some crippling trust issues.
(Or at least she had in the last episode I saw on Netflix!)
One could say the same for another role model of mine, Lisbeth Salander, the Swedish “girl with the dragon tattoo”.
A badass hacker with a thing for emo style, Salander is forever dealing with the after affects of an abusive past.
What is it about these fictional characters that appeals to me?
You mean besides the kickass abilities and dark eye makeup?
It’s the fact that, despite the issues, the baggage, and the occasionally off-putting style, they are strong, likable, and complex characters. Maybe even because of them.
It’s easy believing you’re a burden who’s better off alone.
What’s hard is facing those issues head on. And these supergirls certainly do!
Maybe “Lost Lass” is really my superhero identity.
Me, I’m one of the lucky ones.
While some people can’t leave the house without fear, I am able to travel, run a business, and have a healthy romantic relationship.
It’s actually surprising how many in-between days I have at this point.
Days when I don’t really think about it.
Days when I am more focused on living life.
Not ideal or God-awful, just…good.
Yes, it is still disheartening to realize that everything I’ve been through has affected my state of mind, and my ability to interact.
It has even changed my personality. But that’s not always a bad thing.
Our reaction to trauma is what shapes us.
More than the good days, it’s the hard ones that test us and challenge us to make the right choices.
Every hero has a weakness.
Will we break, or live to fight another day?